Faces of Midland: Emmett Long
Faces of Midland is a collaborative storytelling project celebrating the vibrant lives of those who live, work, and thrive in Midland.
Gender is a gift, not a prescription
Emmett Long’s journey
By Trisha Fenby
Photo by Renee’ Deckrow, Captured Studio
Unlike others who recognize their trans identity through discomfort or dysphoria, Emmett Long had a different experience. Identifying as bisexual in high school, Emmett knew he was “some kind of queer.” It wasn’t until college, where the support of gender-diverse peers allowed Emmett to dive into his identity. A friend offered to use “he/him” pronouns and Emmett agreed, not really thinking anything of it. Only after experiencing this affirming clarity did Emmett realize what was missing in his life.
“I didn’t get the dysphoria until I felt the euphoria of who I really was. It was this comfort that led me to realize I was trans”. Emmett explains. Emmett began testosterone therapy during college, embracing a "second puberty." The lasting changes of a deeper voice, and body hair provided Emmett with acceptance of his body when the cost to continue testosterone therapy became too high. “I don’t feel a ton of discomfort with my body. I use binders, but I don’t feel the need to surgically transition, I am comfortable” Emmett said. He has a true self-understanding in his body, and no desire to “conform.”
Emmett met his spouse, who is nonbinary, at Applebee’s over a decade ago. They married and built an entirely queer family that values mutual respect, love, and personal truth. Four and a half years ago, Emmett gave birth to his daughter and welcomed her with open arms and an open mind.
Emmett emphasizes, “Gender is a gift—not a prescription. Adelaide, (his daughter) can unwrap it, try it on, and if it doesn’t fit, she can choose something else”. Adelaide’s name and identity were given with love, but with the understanding that she may one day say, “I don’t think that fits anymore.” And if she does, they’ll lovingly meet her where she is. Parenting, to Emmett, is about raising an understanding human, rooted in love. His family defies traditional molds but embraces identity and truth with fierce dedication.
From an early age, Emmett’s daughter was introduced to the uniqueness of having a dad who carried and gave birth to her. A dad that was assigned female at birth and lives openly and proudly as himself. With the simplicity that only a child can bring, Adelaide quickly grasped the concept: “Daddy was a girl, but now he’s a boy.” It was Emmett's gentle, age-appropriate honesty that gave her the language and understanding to shamelessly make sense of her world.
As Emmett and his spouse prepare for their second child, expected in February, Adelaide anticipates having a sibling. She understands that it’s usually moms who carry babies, but sometimes Daddies can too. The beauty of it, in her eyes, this is nothing out of the ordinary.
Adelaide is a beautifully perceptive, empathetic, and resilient girl, Emmett shared, “My only worry is never about her; it’s about the world around her. She is already strong, but I want her to be safe. How will the outside world treat her story?” He hopes her understanding will shield rather than burden her. It may be hard for Emmett to see this today, but Adelaide will grow up to be confident in her own skin and a safe haven for other kids—whether they’re queer themselves or simply navigating difference.
For a non-traditional family, values are not much different than any other family. Love doesn’t require explanation. Truth is shared openly, and Identities are honored.